While most gamers are all too familiar with the Super Mario Bros., few remember the enigmatic Fantastic Steve Cousins. Accompanied by his cousin, Ralph, Fantastic Steve led players on a magical journey through the Sausage Fiefdom. When the Mario Bros. soared to fame a few years later, Fantastic Steve sued the plumber for stealing his act. Unfortunately, Fantastic Steve was found dead before the trial began, leading to further speculation on Mario’s involvement with La Cosa Nostra.
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Well, shit. We’ve got iPad fever. The thing may be the cure to everything that’s wrong with our lives, but we must remember our conflicted relationship with the iPhone. For one, it didn’t get us laid. Then, we lost our jobs because of DoodleJump. And third… wait, what’s this 40 minute long voicemail I just got from my dad?
Dynasty Warriors says: fighting with a small army under your command is no different from fighting with a large one: it is merely a question of whether or not you have another fifteen minutes to blow before dinner.
This Christmas, the Schuffs will be sitting around the tree, exchanging gifts in our Full Metal Alchemist attire like we always do. It’s funny how comforting old traditions are, especially around the holidays. We will not be caroling this year, sadly, as David Jr. will still be recovering from the knock on the head he took a few months ago while play-fighting with his nun chucks at the Turkeyday LARP.
GhostOfTomToad @itsame what a night! I feel like this – http://tinyurl.com/84amg4
about 5 hours ago from web in reply to itsame
The 38-year-old Starman appeared Monday in court for a bond hearing. Mr. Starman, who recently hosted the Colorado Independent Video Game Creators Awards, served a six-month sentence in 2003 for owning several multi-bottle rockets without a permit.
OLYMPIC VILLAGE CREEPIN’: In this stealth action segment, you flashback to Michael Phelps’ nights in the Olympic Village. While draconian Olympic rules keep outsiders from visiting the Village, Michael Phelps has never met a rule he couldn’t break – especially not for a gaggle of barely-legal Chinese fangirls.
These screencaps posted from our reporter on the World of Warcraft beat reveal a lonely David Schwimmer begging his guildmates over guildchat to let him call them.
Dear Chris,
Please answer my calls. Jail isn’t a safe place for a pleasantly plump and blush cheeked old man.
Please don’t tell Mrs. Claus, but when I tried to break into Sam’s I couldn’t fit through the door. I decided to grease myself with the baby oil, but that only got me stuck in the doorframe. Now the other prisoners, they can smell it. They can smell the baby oil. They treat me like a greased man toy. They call me Pickled Porky Pig.
Please help me.
Your friend,
Santa
No other instrument leads to as much self-destruction as the drum kit. Rock Band 3 ought to put a timer in the corner that slowly ticks towards zero, making it abundantly clear that from the moment the drummer sits down, it’s only a matter of time before Death comes to claim him.
In front of the Apple Store
Everyone you know is trying not to make eye contact with you.
The bar ungulates with beautiful people Allen has yet to meet and, if not for the next 16 consecutive Tuesday nights in which he’ll play their personal cipher to the final season of LOST, he never would. That’s because they’re different than Allen. Jacob’s a cook and a college drop out. Zelda blogs at a gossip site down in Soho and says she’s never heard of the game she shares a name with – even though Allen brings it up every time they meet.
WHAT ARE THE ODDS? – 20 Points – You were connected with five women in a row.
BUY A LOTTERY TICKET – 50 Points – A woman stopped her pathological “next”-clicking to ask you whether you wanted to see her practice her striptease routine.
Time slows to a crawl. A frame of a moving van launches skyward off its axle and collides with a stray bit of The Walt Disney Company, which pings back towards Earth and glides along the pavement. Fragments of what was once Procter & Gamble lay nearby, their edges charred by flame and greed. The world’s largest stock market index clips the back of an oil tanker and spins seven times in the air, then lands derivative-first on top of a hot dog cart. And it isn’t done there…
Mulgore, 9:33 GMT
Roggie and Siri Two-Moons sat on top of a hill and watched the clouds for two hours before realizing that they were actually plumes of smoke, and that an Alliance raid had destroyed Orgrimmar.