Reason to buy Axe Body Spray #1:
The areas on your body that have Axe Body Spray on them are inherently more awesome than the parts of your body that don’t. In fact, sometimes the areas of your body that don’t have it applied will attack the parts that do, purely out of jealousy. That’s why you have to apply Axe Body Spray to all parts of your body at all times. You can die if you don’t.

Reason to buy Axe Body Spray #2:
Studies show that people who wear Axe Body Spray get into 80% more conversations about Axe Body Spray than people who don’t. Any chance to talk about Axe Body Spray is a chance to make your day better.

Reason to buy Axe Body Spray #3:
Though Axe Body Spray is not a substitute for good hygiene, some men have been known to go weeks without showering, purely off the power of Axe Body Spray. They all got laid, too.

Reason to buy Axe Body Spray #4:
Every commercial that depicts Axe Body Spray turning women into horny sluts has been shot with real women who didn’t know they were being filmed.

Reason to buy Axe Body Spray #5:
Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray Axe Bodyspray.

Reason to buy Axe Body Spray #6:
President Obama uses Axe Bodyspray on a daily basis. Or, if you hate President Obama, substitute Glenn Beck’s name in there.

Reason to buy Axe Body Spray #7:
Axe Bodyspray has been around since 1983, which is around the time that the Famicom came out in Japan. In a way, the two have intertwining destinies. Without Axe Bodyspray, there would be no Famicom. Without the Famicom, there would be no Axe Bodyspray. The point is that Axe Bodyspray has a lot to do with video games.

Reason to buy Axe Body Spray #8:
The Holocaust happened before Axe Body Spray was invented. Coincidence? Highly doubtful.

Reason to buy Axe Body Spray #9:
Every Axe Body Spray comes with a 1 in a 1,000,000 chance of having sex with Megan Fox. Of course, you have to be at the same supermarket that she shops at. And she has to be very lonely. And you should be either Brad Pitt or George Clooney.

Reason to buy Axe Body Spray #10:
Axe Body Spray thinks Hardcasual is a website worth giving money to. Not that they gave us any, but they certainly showed interest. We were like, No way. We’ll do this for free because we love Axe Body Spray so much. So we did.

Reason to buy Axe Body Spray #11:
Axe Body Spray was the inspiration for Disneyland.

Reason to buy Axe Body Spray #12:
When you are old, you will refer to the time before you started to us Axe Body Spray as the “dark times”. And if any of your grandchildren say something bad about Axe Body Spray, you will beat the living shit out of them.