World of Warcraft Watch 1.25.10
Monday, January 25, 2010
Murloc Village, 1:55 GMT
A level seventy elite gnome warrior woke up inside a murloc shanty after a night of heavy drinking and thought, Oh God, why do I smell like fish?
While most gamers are all too familiar with the Super Mario Bros., few remember the enigmatic Fantastic Steve Cousins. Accompanied by his cousin, Ralph, Fantastic Steve led players on a magical journey through the Sausage Fiefdom. When the Mario Bros. soared to fame a few years later, Fantastic Steve sued the plumber for stealing his act. Unfortunately, Fantastic Steve was found dead before the trial began, leading to further speculation on Mario’s involvement with La Cosa Nostra.
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Well, shit. We’ve got iPad fever. The thing may be the cure to everything that’s wrong with our lives, but we must remember our conflicted relationship with the iPhone. For one, it didn’t get us laid. Then, we lost our jobs because of DoodleJump. And third… wait, what’s this 40 minute long voicemail I just got from my dad?
Murloc Village, 1:55 GMT
A level seventy elite gnome warrior woke up inside a murloc shanty after a night of heavy drinking and thought, Oh God, why do I smell like fish?
In front of the Apple Store
Everyone you know is trying not to make eye contact with you.
When my wife sees me pull into the driveway with this juicy morsel in tow, she’ll have to forgive me for all prior transgressions. Then the kids will follow suit. Everything will go back to the way it was. It’s a fresh start. A respawn. Redemption, thy name is Green Mushroom!
Axe Bodyspray has been around since 1983, which is around the time that the Famicom came out in Japan. In a way, the two have intertwining destinies. Without Axe Bodyspray, there would be no Famicom. Without the Famicom, there would be no Axe Bodyspray. The point is that Axe Bodyspray has a lot to do with video games.
The blue turtle shell is only the tip of the iceberg. One has to wonder, are there still banana peels rotting on the brunette slopes of Choco Mountain? And how many fake item boxes have been left to the elements out in Yoshi Valley? These are the things we never think about when the confetti has been swept away and the winners and losers have all been chosen.
Mulgore, 9:33 GMT
Roggie and Siri Two-Moons sat on top of a hill and watched the clouds for two hours before realizing that they were actually plumes of smoke, and that an Alliance raid had destroyed Orgrimmar.