You can hardly contain your excitement while collating copies and forwarding memos. What will it be like to join forces with Sazh? Great warmth fills your heart as you call your mother to cancel another dinner. Mom can wait; let’s spend some quality time with a baby chocobo that lives in an afro.
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With God of War III’s release, the Kratos Trilogy has finally come to a close. While Hardcasual is really going to miss all the foot-slashing, we know that these are things a “mature” person shouldn’t enjoy. (And certainly no one under the age of eighteen.) We haven’t played it yet, though, because we plan on importing the Chinese version of the game: Mr. Bald’s Jumprope Tag Adventure!
Hard to believe Christmas has been delayed to Q1 2010. Sorry everyone! But, in hindsight, we should have seen this coming. The whole season has been a bit of a non-starter: Rudolph got a Red-Ring, we got Tony Hawk RIDE and no one’s getting on Xbox Live. Jeez, we can’t recall a winter this bad since The Great Winter Games Drought of 05. Merry December 25th!
Detroit, Michigan
Gordon Freelander spotted chasing paparazzi off his driveway, who were snapping pictures of him as he fixed up his cherry red 1976 Ford Mustang.
Shaun stands amongst a field of ash tress from which thousands of men are hung by their tongues. They scream for relief from an eternity of pain in a synchronous, harmonic and lispy groan: HELLLLLFFFFFF UTTTHHHHHHHHH!
No other instrument leads to as much self-destruction as the drum kit. Rock Band 3 ought to put a timer in the corner that slowly ticks towards zero, making it abundantly clear that from the moment the drummer sits down, it’s only a matter of time before Death comes to claim him.
Samus blasts the spiked beetle and wipes the innards off her visor. She surveys the desolate landscape, spinning around to get her bearings. Straight ahead, purple door on the left…damn it. She sighs and opens her map again.
Dalaran, 23:10 GMT
As they washed Hippogryph shit out of their Tier 7 helms, two tauren adventurers promised themselves that they’d never exchange jewelcrafting tips beneath a flight path ever again.