Excerpts from “Shooting for the Presidency… From Downtown!”

The election of Barack Obama was no fluke. For 8 years America suffered under a government lacking in morality and fortitude. When tragedy struck on September 11, 2001, they countered not from a place of intellect, but of fear and cowardice. In Barack, America saw change. And they saw hope. They saw in this man a boy of a broken family, a teen that fought bigotry and a man who got nothing on my ‘oops! Half-white man can’t jump!

.

If in 2012 the American public wants to rewind and watch the Bush/Cheney approach once again devalue our great nation, Sarah Palin is an apt, if aggressive candidate. But if what they want is a power forward with an inhuman mid-range jumper, vote Malone. Karl Malone.

.

We are more dependent than ever on fossil fuels that come from oil wells installed in the very nations who fund, house and inhibit our most dangerous enemies. Now, the people in Lawrence, Kansas and the people in Toledo, Ohio and the people in Flint, Michigan, they say a problem is only a problem if you have a solution. And they’re right. So here’s my solution: dunk. Every day. The raw kinetic energy, combined and harnessed, may be our only way out of this crude circle. And if it isn’t hey, we’ll still have mad ups.

.

America is in an economic rough patch. We can’t buy a bucket.