While most gamers are all too familiar with the Super Mario Bros., few remember the enigmatic Fantastic Steve Cousins. Accompanied by his cousin, Ralph, Fantastic Steve led players on a magical journey through the Sausage Fiefdom. When the Mario Bros. soared to fame a few years later, Fantastic Steve sued the plumber for stealing his act. Unfortunately, Fantastic Steve was found dead before the trial began, leading to further speculation on Mario’s involvement with La Cosa Nostra.
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Well, shit. We’ve got iPad fever. The thing may be the cure to everything that’s wrong with our lives, but we must remember our conflicted relationship with the iPhone. For one, it didn’t get us laid. Then, we lost our jobs because of DoodleJump. And third… wait, what’s this 40 minute long voicemail I just got from my dad?
Guys, are you back from your midnight launch parties for Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks yet? Wait, you didn’t go to the launch party? Oh, you didn’t even know it came out? Celebrate the least-promoted Zelda ever by remembering that you’re still not quite sure how you figured out that Water Temple.
In front of the Apple Store
Everyone you know is trying not to make eye contact with you.
When my wife sees me pull into the driveway with this juicy morsel in tow, she’ll have to forgive me for all prior transgressions. Then the kids will follow suit. Everything will go back to the way it was. It’s a fresh start. A respawn. Redemption, thy name is Green Mushroom!
No other instrument leads to as much self-destruction as the drum kit. Rock Band 3 ought to put a timer in the corner that slowly ticks towards zero, making it abundantly clear that from the moment the drummer sits down, it’s only a matter of time before Death comes to claim him.
Without another word, he’s back at a new machine, and as we stared, confused, in his direction, we could make out his muttered “oh, the action is fast on this one” and “I haven’t played pinball since Rhonda got pregnant and ruined my life.” We looked at each other – Mom’s name isn’t Rhonda. Rick, my older brother, starts to cry, too.
Mulgore, 9:33 GMT
Roggie and Siri Two-Moons sat on top of a hill and watched the clouds for two hours before realizing that they were actually plumes of smoke, and that an Alliance raid had destroyed Orgrimmar.