World of Warcraft Watch
Monday, November 30, 2009
Blasted Lands, 13:01 GMT
A really important crystal shattered into a dozen pieces and of course it was up to you to collect those fucking things.
You can hardly contain your excitement while collating copies and forwarding memos. What will it be like to join forces with Sazh? Great warmth fills your heart as you call your mother to cancel another dinner. Mom can wait; let’s spend some quality time with a baby chocobo that lives in an afro.
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With God of War III’s release, the Kratos Trilogy has finally come to a close. While Hardcasual is really going to miss all the foot-slashing, we know that these are things a “mature” person shouldn’t enjoy. (And certainly no one under the age of eighteen.) We haven’t played it yet, though, because we plan on importing the Chinese version of the game: Mr. Bald’s Jumprope Tag Adventure!
Blasted Lands, 13:01 GMT
A really important crystal shattered into a dozen pieces and of course it was up to you to collect those fucking things.
Detroit, Michigan
Gordon Freelander spotted chasing paparazzi off his driveway, who were snapping pictures of him as he fixed up his cherry red 1976 Ford Mustang.
I can’t believe I didn’t see the signs until we bought this game, man. She’s totally breaking you and me up just like she broke up Lennon and McCartney. In fact, this is even worse, because we’re more than just creative partners… we’re roommates.
How did I, Cliff Blezinski, become CliffyB? Kitchen-squats. And when Cliffy B didn’t bed a dozen women a night, what’d he do? Juiced pheromones out of dominant apes and slurped them like a friggin Diet Soda. Cliffy B takes action. So when folks get upset about New Games Journalism, the Cliffster fixes it.
The autobiography of the psychic wunderkind who saved the planet over a decade ago debuted Tuesday at number three on the New York Times bestseller list and features a foreword by acclaimed inventor Doctor Andonuts. It is filled with 259 blank pages.
Dalaran, 23:10 GMT
As they washed Hippogryph shit out of their Tier 7 helms, two tauren adventurers promised themselves that they’d never exchange jewelcrafting tips beneath a flight path ever again.