Analysts from WDP Intelligence released a new report this morning, blaming the PlayStation 3’s struggling position in the marketplace on its unfortunately thick form factor. The report, which has sent Sony’s stock prices on a further tumble in early trading on the Nikkei, attempts to explain the slow performance and continuing downturn in PlayStation 3 sales. One analyst, quoted in the report, said, “Sony attempted to enter a crowded marketplace with a surprisingly premium-priced product – one no one could have every expected to have difficulty performing. However, our research has shown that families in these economic times are not prepared to buy something so damn thick.”

The PlayStation 3’s ridiculously thick 4 inch form factor is almost a solid half-inch thicker than other systems of this generation. The report quoted one 23 year old man from Little Rock, Arkansas, as saying, “I often find myself in a Wal-Mart with $500 in my pocket, and as I wander through the electronics section, I think, ‘maybe I should get one of those PS3s. I mean, the price is fair, the lineup of exclusive titles seems robust, and all my friends play online with it. Then I realize – damn, that thing is just too damn thick.’”

The WDP Group’s earlier report on the PlayStation Portable, which postulated that the only thing keeping it from massive success was its insistence that it use removable media, has already been accepted with open arms by Sony in the form of their upcoming PSP Go! device. In that report, parents surveyed told the group that “buying discs on a store shelf made too much sense” and “my kids often just were putting slices of bread or old Village People 45s into their PSPs and breaking them.”

Developers added onto the charge, as Gabe Newell, co-founder of Valve Software, admitted, “I would have a lot fewer problems developing for the PS3 if it were just a little bit thinner. I find that things that are large or thick in my house only remind me of my gargantuan frame, and that if I had more systems that were just a little slimmer, I would be a much happier person. Hell, I’d slog back into that intolerable devkit if it just meant that they would release a slightly slimmer version of that console.”

Sony, a company long known for its quick and nimble response to consumer concerns and its logical stance on adapting to the American market, has not yet released a reply to the group’s findings, but the internet rumor mill currently suggests that the company is already aware of the issue, and seems poised to release a new hardware iteration that will solve all the PS3’s problems in one fell swoop.

A WDP analyst comments, “It seems that if Sony follows through and makes these changes, then 2009 will finally be the year of the PS3. Or 2010. Actually, maybe 2011 if they take a while to get into the retail channel. But the year of the PS3 is coming. I think.”