In a tragic turn of events this morning, Hideo Kojima’s production company opened a black hole that threatens to shortly destroy the universe by announcing the upcoming announcement of their announcement of an upcoming game. The illogical series of events, made possible by a number of games blogs mindlessly fellating PR flacks, is believed to be the cause of the black hole, which began in the Tokyo-based offices of popular games news magazine Famitsu.

The black hole, which has already consumed the majority of Japan, is one of the first traced directly to the illogical practices of modern press-whoring. It is also likely to be the last, as the majority of the world will likely be broken down into subatomic particles, then sent through space and time to what scientists posit will either be an alternate universe or the planet Vulcan.

In a brief interview via telephone with Hardcasual, Kojima said of his project, “A black hole? Perhaps that is a clue! Although I’ve said Snake’s story ends in Metal Gear Solid 4, there is so much more that we can do with the universe. Check back on May 29th for a Next…” And after that, Kojima was sucked mid-sentence into the black hole.

Although the universe will likely cease to exist within a matter of hours, Kojima Productions has been unwilling to reveal any further information on their upcoming project at the time of this article’s publication. However, sources within Konami can independently confirm to Hardcasual that it’s “just some wanky new Metal Gear game. Raiden’s in it or something.” They then added that they wished they could have said goodbye to their families before the apocalypse, instead of promoting the announcement of a promotional announcement website.

Stay tuned for more on this developing story.