Some people think that they get Noby Noby Boy. Some people think that there isn’t anything to get about Noby Noby Boy, and it’s stupid. Some people think that Keita Takahashi, the creator of Noby Noby Boy, is just a drug-addled freak, and that the game is beyond stupid.

Well, as someone who has been called a drug-addled freak more than once in his life, let me tell you something:

I figured it out.

Noby Noby Boy is about… life, man. See, I was playing Noby Noby Boy the other day, just chilling, when all of a sudden it hits me – this is all just like the Intro to Political Science course I’m auditing right now. Man, it’s capitalism! It’s a worm, it’s an insidious beast, and the motherfucker is just going out there and seeing how big it can get.

I tried telling my bro about this, but he was totally too baked to get it. I mean, we were all a little baked, but what’s the big deal about having a big thought or two? He was all like “man, shut up so I can stretch this worm guy further, GIRL needs us to get to Mars,” and I was all like “man, MARS IS NOT THE ANSWER. The answer is to totally reconfigure our political parties. The two party system, man.”

And my bro, well, he got kinda confused then, and that’s when I explained it to him: Noby Noby Boy is about the impracticality of a third party in the American political system, and how it’s unfair. See, the BOY is like the Republicans, and the Democrats, and then GIRL is the higher cause of…

What? Shit, man, watching this dude eating has got me hungry. Wait, what time is it?

Alright, let me get to the point. Noby Noby Boy is about the relations of the individual to the state… Wait, that’s not it. Tell this interviewer what I said ten minutes ago, bro. That was totally it. Shit. Hey, man, do you have bus fare? This whole thing was supposed to be quicker.

Darren Plitt