Meat Bun T-shirt Being Explained to Everyone at Party
Friday, 03/12/10

How many times did this conversation about the t-shirt take place over the course of the two and a half hour party in Sheila’s backyard? A dozen times, at least. Friends, family, the hired help – no one was spared the explanation. Those who made the mistake of lingering near the drink table rarely returned, and those who did did so hastily, as if a horde of wild animals was about to stampede through and there was only two minutes to pour a vodka cranberry.

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Image of the Virgin Mary Discovered in F.A.Q. for Pokemon Snap

Friday, March 27, 2009

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Millions of Christians from all over the internet are making a pilgrimage to GameFaqs.com to catch a glimpse of an image of the blessed Virgin Mary in an FAQ for the N64 game, Pokemon Snap. The image, which many are calling ‘the miracle for our times’, can be found in the section about how to best take a picture of the two Squirtles sunbathing at the start of level three.

“This is clearly a sign that God wants the lambs to return to the flock. And in this case, the flock is the Pokemon franchise,’ said Pastor Ned Belfry of the Greensfield West Baptist Church.

“My congregation has fallen upon hard times lately. Many have lost their jobs and are having difficulty just putting food on the table. We were praying for a miracle, unaware that all our prayers would have been answered if we had not turned out back on Pickacho and all his friends when they went out of style,” Pastor Belfry added.

“Hear us, Lord, for we have spent many a day digging through bargain bins for this, your most Pokemonical of treasures, knowing that once we find it you will shower us in your mercy!”

The sight of the blessed Virgin Mary was first noticed by a thirteen-year-old boy living in Surprise, Arizona. According to a report by the Associated Press, Benjamin Leewood stumbled upon the FAQ while looking for a site about Pokemon trading cards, recognized the Virgin Mary from a candle his mother brought home, and brought the image to his uncle’s attention. His uncle immediately posted a link to the FAQ on Fark.

Representatives from GameFAQS.com, the website that hosts the image of the Virgin Mary, issued a statement pleading with religious fanatics to ‘cut [their] servers some slack.’

“We are pleased to have so many new people interested in GameFAQs,” said Steve Dorsey, the site’s webmaster, “but constantly refreshing the page with the hopes that your cancer will be healed or your baby will be blessed is unfair to those who simply want to use the site to find out the correct combination of buttons to pull off Fatalities in Mortal Kombat.”