By now, you’ve probably seen the cryptic message on Konami’s website – Kojima Productions is up to something new, and XBox fanboys are cheering a 360 port, Wii fanboys are cheering a Wii port, and people who really aren’t that into videogames are cheering an iPhone… something.

But we’ve been doing our detective work here at Hardcasual, and for us, that means sitting back and thinking “What would Ghostwriter do?” And we think we’ve figured it out – “A Next Metal Gear” isn’t just broken English. It’s not another sign that perhaps Hideo Kojima may not have the best grasp on how to put a sentence together, let alone an epic narrative. No, in all the genius that is Kojima, he’s constructed… an anagram.

We’ve found three possibilities, all of which have his genre-busting fingerprints all over them.

Well, maybe this one didn’t make as much sense as the other two. Here’s our second possibility:

This makes a lot more sense… Kojima’s obviously been playing a game that actually gets the politics of factional warfare in a lawless world right, and he’s offering a little hint for a future feature to the developers. Nothing would add some flavor to your adventures in wartorn Africa like a few sexual encounters in the protective sheath of nylon.

Well, except for a farting monkey in a diaper.

And, finally…

The green text doesn’t signify that it’s for 360, silly fanboys. No, Kojima just wants to remind you, subconsciously, that as you head into this busy holiday season, it’s never a bad idea to bring along a salami to any gathering you may attend.

… So, who else is excited for Metal Gear Solid 5: Games-Journalists-Makin’-It-With-Meat-Products-In-A-Mosquito-Net, coming in 2009 to the iPhone?